Tuesday, January 17, 2006

2006 - Year of the Dog

Well, it's time to emerge from my summer coma, just three days away from my official end of the summer holidays - The Big Day Out - which from the lineup looks like the weakest Big Day Out ever, but I've got free tickets so I can't complain.

I've always maintained that an outright ban should be imposed on local news during the holiday season, and this summer has not changed my mind.

There's Auckland City soldifying it's position as NZ's well-off yet deeply stupid step-sister with the "Oh My God, they're gonna put NATIVE trees in our shitty main street (PC Gone Mad, ya know)" campaign, which has spawned an extraordinary council meeting resulting in 'saving' three gaunt trees from the chop.

Congratulations Auckland, now if you take that passion for protecting upstanding immigrant trees from the filthy Native (read Maori) trees and redirect it into trying to fix the city's problems with traffic, housing, town planning, infastructure and lack of community spirit then perhaps Auckland City would no longer be such a strong challenger to Wanaganui for 'most fucked up city in New Zealand'

Then there's Statistics NZ bucking the tradition of asking fact-based questions with the creation of "New Zealander/Kiwi" as an 'ethnic group' in the 2006 census, so that when I fill out the census form on behalf of my pet dog (a Cook Islander/Samoan/Irish/Australian/Maori/Pakeha who's a smoker and earns 50k a year) I will now have one more box to tick.

The thing that really annoys me is that this is the same Statistics NZ that refused to recognise 'jedi' as a actual religion in 2001 despite over 50,000 persons submitting it as their faith of choice. It was the third most popular faith after Christianity and 'No religion' in 2001 but it was not categorised as jedi was considered "response deemed outside the scope of recognised religions", yet Statistics NZ still recognises Scientology as an legitimate religion.

Still, long time talker, first time writer, Kerre Woodham sums up the feeling of Pakeha, erm... "Kiwi" New Zealanders,
The decision by people to call themselves "New Zealanders", and the decision to allow them to do so, may not be anthropologically accurate. But it's a step towards building a nation that's proud of its heritage and positive about its future.
Exactly! Who are anthropologists to say what is and isn't an ethnic group. I put my trust in callers to Newstalk ZB. It's not as if it's a ethnic group is something that can be defined.
As always with 'racial issues' it is those who do not feel a strong attachment to any particular ethnic group leading the charge to force everyone else to join them as 'one nation' (together under Dagg)

On the subject of mediocre Herald on Sunday columists Deborah Coddington has been on a tear lately, it seems she's trying to carve out a niche as the antipodean Ann Coulter, the bitterness and resentment in her Herald on Sunday rants are approaching legendary status, and yet another reason to fork out $3 a day to APN for it's premium content (or use the search function). This week Deb's ire was set upon the evil blog world, which is so irrelevant, powerless and spiteful that Coddington devoted an entire column of vitirol to it.
Still, thanks to Deborah, at least we now know the truth that Jordan Carter is indeed a souless robot. No wonder Farrar and Blumsky got such a drubbing in Wellington Central when they were up against a humanoid who needs not sleep.

3 comments:

span said...

actually it's more likely to be DPF who is in fact non-human, more specifically a member of the undead:
http://fatw.blogspot.com/2004/09/making-time-for-evil.html

thank you for yet another chance to spread this malicious rumour :-)

Blair said...

...so right after posting on extreme rhetoric, you are now accusing people who want a bit of greenery with their concrete of being racist?

What a dick.

jarrod said...

In the event that Jordan does turn out to be just a clever facsimile of a human being, it should not be forgotten that the robot infiltration of the National Party goes right to the top:
http://fatw.blogspot.com/2005/08/giant-frickin-lasers.html